Did you know women on the whole instigate divorce more often than men?
Some statistics show as many as 70% of divorces proceedings are started by women, with variability across countries and cultures.
Did you also know that the main reason cited by women that have affairs is a lack of connection and intimacy?
Feeling like their partner no longer cares for them or takes an interest in what they do. That conversations have become transactional at best. A sense of lacking quality time and connection.
The trouble with this is often this can be a bit of a “frog in boiling water” situation for guys. The warning signs of relationship trouble can slowly emerge but the man can be blind to them or pushing them away as they feel too overwhelming or challenging to deal with on top of his already overstretched life.
So what are these warning signs?
Communication breakdown: Discussions become superficial or organisational only. Deep discussions become rare.
Fading Intimacy: Intimacy is NOT just sex! There are many forms that intimacy can take both physical and emotional. It’s a cause for concern if neither are present.
Emotional disengagement : “Mmm… what’s that? Yeah whatever you want…”. When you’re feeling ever distant from each other and there’s no genuine interest in each others lives.
Being defensive and keeping secrets : Becoming defensive when confronted about behaviours and withholding information can be signs you have trust issues as couple.
Constant arguments : Some disagreement and conflict is normal in a healthy relationship. Too little might a warning sign too ( see above ). Constant and unresolved arguing will poison your connection over time and is a sure sign to seek help.
With increased awareness you can spot the warning signs in your own relationships. It could be something or nothing but without having an open, honest talk with your partner you’ll never know, potentially until it’s too late.
P.S. If you’re a guy and this is something you’ve noticed in your own relationship and you want to get things back on track then contact me or watch this space for something coming soon from myself and fellow coach Phil Airson that helps address all these issues and so much more for men.
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